How Feminism has changed over the years

Shania
5 min readMay 6, 2021

I personally don’t see myself as a feminist in the present day as its ideology is just chaotic. One particular person I believe has valid points on today's idea of feminism is Candace Owens. Candace explains that women are being taught what feminism is rather than experiencing it and is creating up a power struggle in many relationships.

Photo by Jen Theodore on Unsplash

I had a conversation with one of my roommates who claims to be a feminist of which I went on saying ‘I don’t have an issue with men buying me gifts or paying for dinner if they appreciate me’, and she took that as me devaluing myself.

How does a man wanting to take care of me make me any less feminist? I then said that if a man wanting to spend money on me doesn’t make me feminist, then I’m not one. I think this whole perception started with who pays for the bill. I’m not saying you should always have a man do everything for you but I do believe they should look after you. Once in a while, I do pay the bill when I know I want to have a long meaningful relationship with someone.

Yes, I can afford to pay for both of us but I feel men love that feeling of being in control and being dominant.

Another issue with today's feminism is the perception of toxic masculinity. Just because a man gets angry at you once makes him toxic? Make it make sense. This goes together with the whole ‘men are trash’ misconception where women usually take to Twitter and tweet about how bad men are just because he failed to understand you.

I won’t be a hypocrite but I do say it here and there but I believe putting good men in the same bracket a the bad ones is toxic. The whole idea of feminism is toxic. These women that claim to advocate for it so bad then proceed to blame men when things don’t go their way once they have this position of power.

The purpose of feminism is to promote equality between both men and women but it’s now just women hating men.

My question is what did they do that makes us hate them so much?

Years ago before women even had the right to vote or work, we were meant to be caretakers of the household; have children, cook, and maybe even learn how to play the piano and knit in their free time. Honestly in today's society being a housewife doesn’t look half as bad as the expectations we have created for ourselves today. I feel as women once we had a taste of power we didn’t know how to properly in terms of what we wanted as equals with men.

Men being feminine

Women are also wanting men to acting more feminine in the sense that they can be somewhat masculine and this then brought up the whole gender stigma of what people want to be identified as.

Why should your pronouns matter? Suddenly people are having ‘Theybies’ (babies with no identified gender). Emily Ratajkowski is one of the few celebrities that came out ad said her child can choose what gender to identify as when they become a legal adult, and still proceeded to call them ‘him’. The whole gender identification is causing an imbalance inti the structural norms of society and I believe we as a society need to bring back that structure.

Photo by Shaojie on Unsplash

The purpose of wanting men to be feminine doesn’t mean they should start dressing up as women. The people that conform to this are often the LGBTQ+ community.

If you are familiar with Jubilee on Youtube, they released a video on men rating each other from 1–5 on who they think is more fashionable, one of the men being, yes, you guessed it. Gay.

Already from the start of the video the hetero men are picking the gay guy as number 1 for his outfit just because they don’t want to seem homophobic but I believe them not being honest was homophobic. Like if someone's outfit looks trash, just be honest and tell them. If you’re truly confident and love to look like a rainbow threw up on you, then go ahead.

But I’ll violate you regardless.

So by certain women normalizing this feminist attribute on men, it’s ruining the future for upcoming generations. Like this should not be normal, I wouldn’t date a man that wears skirts and dresses. All these celebrities just do it just to have a diverse audience.

OnlyFans

In the age of Onlyfans or online prostitution rather, some women are claiming the platform is empowering for women as they willingly post and sell their nudes to creepy old men online. I’ve seen certain posts on Twitter where women in certain professions (teachers, nurses) were fired after their employers found out they had an Onlyfans.

I truly think their employers had every right to release them from employment as those types of professions have children or rather minors involved and I don’t think any parent would want to be taught by someone selling their nudes online. No, I am not bashing sex workers, however, with how easily accessible information is online what makes these teachers, etc., think their students won’t stumble upon their website. The age at which teenagers look at pornographic material online is getting younger and younger.

If you look at that quora question as well as the responses, you can see how distressed and lost the parent feels, and now why would you expect them to have their child taught by a teacher with an Onlyfans.

How is exposing nudity online: 1) body positivity, 2) feminism?

Even if you set your nudes for a price, men are still in power as you are only telling them you aren’t worth anything rather than your body. If you are trying to get yourself through college, that’s a different case as you still want to better your life but if you see it as a ‘business plan’ or a long-term investment then that is the dumbest thing you can say you’ve accomplished in life.

Modern feminism has somehow ruined what women years back truly fought for when it came to equality.

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