You might be wondering, what is serial dating?
Serial daters are unique, to say the least. They go on casual dates and often see multiple people at once. They don’t seek emotional connection or they choose not to rather and often have a line of excuses waiting to explain why they can’t be in a committed relationship.
I have come across some conversations on a few clubhouse groups where some men have stated that some reasons they give to the women they are dating after multiple sexual encounters would be, “I’m attracted to them and enjoy their time, but I just wouldn’t date them”. As a woman, I am aware some men are very clueless with their actions as not all of them state their intentions whilst on the date or ‘talking’. This often leaves the woman or man in a sense of thinking there could be a potential relationship from the outcome of the date(s).
Serial dating is more or less an addiction as people are in love with the thrill and excitement of meeting someone new, going on cocktail dates, the movies, etc. With the help of dating apps, it’s so easy to chat and meet new people regularly. However, during the pandemic, depending on where you are in the world- most cities are currently on lockdown.
So What Makes Someone a Serial Dater?
Serial daters are often people scared of rejection or wanting to be the one holding more dominance in a relationship. Often this results in one dating multiple people at the same time to somewhat balance their emotions and not get attached to someone too quickly. It also comes to not allowing yourself to be vulnerable in a relationship.
I’m no expert but I do have conversations with friends who I know are serial daters. One friend of mine was in a situationship for months on end, being patient and hoping for the girl to see he truly cares. The relationship they had was entirely platonic and did not lead to anywhere sexual, however, although being aware he was in the void of a situationship… he was also friend-zoned. He put his energy into getting to know the girl that it led to nowhere after nearly a year. I would say he was in love with her, as wasn’t talking to any other woman and often came to me for advice (single people give the best advice btw).
But his efforts to pursue this girl failed and to get over her he embarked on a series of dates. At one point I recall he went on 6 dates with 6 different girls in a week. In his defense, I know some girls that have had 3 dates in one day with 3 different guys; a brunch date, a lunch date, and the sneaky one-night stand after midnight. From my observation and just learning about other people's good and bad dating experiences, women are more likely to be serial daters as we are more emotional. Many reasons for serial dating is fear of rejection and using this method just makes it easy for women not to get too attached to men they are attracted to but don’t want to commit.
Everyone has had their fair experience of dating apps or even just meeting someone on Instagram. The classic way of telling a stranger they are attractive is often liking a set amount of photos and if they are interested they do the same thing back and either one initiates the conversation.
It’s often hard to tell what someone’s true intentions are after the first date, some signs are replies get slower, which leads to ghosting or they aren’t an ass and will be upfront about it. I have done my fair share of ghosting and getting ghosted ‘on is a tragic feeling, however, I often ghost cause that said person doesn’t get the hint that I am not interested. Frustrating.
Now serial daters love the validation, knowing that they can have anyone they want and leave the ‘relationship’ or situationship they’ve built up whether it be 2 or 3 dates. They often never say their true intentions and are always busy when you aren’t on their weekly rooster.
That being said, if they want to see you after 12 AM they belong to the streets.
