Why do Women Romanticize Over Serial Killers

Shania
3 min readDec 20, 2021

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When we think of serial killers, our first thoughts are usually based on how many people they killed, how they did it and what the motive was.

Photo by Fernando Aguilar on Unsplash

The glorification of serial killers seems to have come from the popularity and captivity of true crime documentaries. A large percentage of women are into true crime documentaries and some often get an attraction for the said serial killer and feel sympathy and think…

Maybe they may have been innocent.

But why are women obsessed with the idea of being with a serial killer? Is it the thrill, or maybe just how attractive the man is?

Why are women more susceptible to this idea more than men?

Some studies claim it is due to a power dynamic, as the viewpoint of which these women see these serial killers (if they put themselves in their shoes) is a way of being tough or powerful, as that's the only way they can feel that power, which is through their imagination and the experience of someone else as women are generally not tough.

These women that romanticize serial killers live vicariously through these killers and it brings somewhat curiosity of what their life could be if they were to be involved romantically with a man like that.

Ted Bundy is probably one of the most well known serial killers of the 20th century as his charm and good looks are what drew women in.

Nevertheless, it didn’t explain why women would risk their lives and defend both a man-eater and a murderer to the lengths they went to. Many women wrote letters to Ted while he was in prison and many started becoming frequent visitors of his and wrote to him occasionally.

Other than his attractiveness and charm, there was really nothing else to back as to why these women would go to ends to defend this man and testify his innocence.

And yes, they were very sane women- many of whom were well educated with PhDs and good jobs.

But what made them for in love with a killer?

Photo by Alvin Mahmudov on Unsplash

Intelligence and personality aren’t really factors that fully influence these women who seemingly fall in love with serial killers- according to Sheila Isenberg author of ‘Women who love men who kill’.

A factor that does have an influence is past trauma i.e. psychological abuse as a child. By getting involved romantically with a convict or a serial killer locked up in jail, it gives certain women dominance as they have the power to accept phone calls, plan visits, etc.

From a certain viewpoint, it could be seen as them gaining control of the situation and putting their past trauma and abuses to the side, but psychologically the man is still in control as these women are drawn to their personas and uncanny charm.

Women that fall for serial killers or convicts usually have their basic needs being met, which is in this case, the psychological need of feeling loved and wanted. The whole idea of it all has them feeling as though they are part of their very own romance novel and the adrenaline is waiting for their ‘lover’ to be released.

Once they are blindsided by the romantic idea, any horrendous part of their past is often overlooked as these women think these men are innocent or not mentally insane just because they are attractive men.

To sum it up, women romanticize over these types of men mainly due to how women are still perceived in society and how women still aren’t taken seriously when given leadership roles. Being in a relationship with a man in jail is the only thing that allows women of such hierarchy to feel more powerful than they already are.

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Shania
Shania

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